Beth the Carnivore

I have been remiss in past weeks for writing about Miss Beth. I am far too overworked with a new client and preparation tasks for an upcoming conference. The end is in sight, however and I am looking forward to relaying some humorous stories again. Despite my lack of time, I could not pass up this little gem...

Having a open afternoon and the inability to go outside with Beth and Elliott due to the smoke in the air, I decided to take a trip to the grocery store to stock up the pantry and fridge before my trip to Texas. Elliott is always happy to go to "play care" at the store where he can play with other children and watch a movie without me pestering him to turn off the T.V.

Beth is not at all interested in going to play care. She cries mournfully and wraps herself so tightly around my neck and arm that it is nearly impossible to pry her away. I have lately ushered her through the aisles as fast as I can while feeding her various treats to keep her seated in the shopping cart (never thought I'd do that - she must be out of danger, eh!). It is very difficult to make it through our neighborhood Raley's quickly because we have become friends with many of the employees. Furthermore, the pharmacy staff are all fans of Beth's and want to admire her when we visit the store (they know of her scary start and complicated first year with the hundred or so prescriptions we have filled there).

Every time I go to Raleys, I race up and down the aisles hoping I can get the shopping done before it becomes impossible to keep Beth in the cart. Today was especially difficult so I detoured to the bakery counter a little earlier than usual to get her a cookie. We waited patiently for the baker to bring us a cookie while Beth admired sprinkled donuts and various treats. Since the baker was occupied, the deli person came over to give her a cookie and take my order for roast beef. While she handed Beth her sprinkle cookie, I asked for a half-pound of roast beef.

Now, who in their right mind would expect my diminutive little girl to prefer meat to a cookie, right? I mean, it is a little hard to picture her devouring a chicken leg with strings of meat hanging from her delicate mouth like a she-lion ripping flesh from a wildebeast. Well, Beth proved me wrong; as soon as she heard me say "roast beef," her ears perked up and she looked me straight in the eye, dropped her cookie and said "MEAT!"

I thought the deli-girl was going to drop that 10 pound hunk of prime rib right on the floor! She did manage to gather herself and then promptly presented Beth with a giant piece of the reddest, prime roast beef I have ever seen. Beth's response was a most endearing smile and a rapid stuffing of said protein and cholesterol into her gaping mouth.

I made it home with scarcely more than a quarter pound of roast beef but the rest of the shopping trip went a whole lot smoother. Yes, my girl is a carnivore. She never did touch the cookie. Elliott ate it on the way home. Beth was curiously thirsty, however...